


Christmas Kisses (aka Sam is So Done With Your Shit)

by DreamcatchersDaughter



Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Couch Cuddles, Epic Bromance, Fluff, Jealous Bucky, Jealous Steve, Kisses, M/M, More Fluff, Mutual Pining, Natasha Is a Good Bro, Oblivious Tony Stark, Sams a good bro, Sams done with your shit
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-06
Updated: 2015-12-06
Packaged: 2018-05-05 05:07:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,837
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5362508
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DreamcatchersDaughter/pseuds/DreamcatchersDaughter
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Their mutual pining is driving him crazy, but its okay cause Natasha's got a plan.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Christmas Kisses (aka Sam is So Done With Your Shit)

**Author's Note:**

  * For [InsaneJuliann](https://archiveofourown.org/users/InsaneJuliann/gifts), [Potrix](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Potrix/gifts).



> A/N: So this is some more mistletoe fluff, cause I can’t seem to let go of the idea. Plus really, Tony deserves all the kisses. This ones for InsaneJuliann cause she is having a tough time of it and Potrix cause shes bloody awesome and always answers my many TJ/Tony questions. Which you should totally check out her AU cause hot damn. This is totally unedited so go easy on me please and I hope you all enjoy.

Sam loves his crazy little family hes ended up with, but for fucks-sake sometimes they drive him up a damn wall.

Natasha sat curled up on the love seat, tucked cozily into his side, looking for all the world like shes focused intently on the tablet in her lap. Sam knows better however, that shes watching the scene in the kitchen unfold in all its, frankly pathetic in Sam’s opinion, glory. He swears he has never seen someone look so sappy and love struck before.

Oh wait, yes he has. Just the other day, in fact, on Steve’s stupid mug instead of Bucky’s. All he knows is that these boys both have it bad for the resident mad scientist and Tony, poor soul, is oblivious as all hell.  He watches as Bucky nudges a cup full of hot black tar in Tony’s direction, smiling sappily when Tony lets out a little moan of appreciation. Tony smiles adoringly back up Bucky.

Sam just stares at them both, flummoxed. Internally he’s waving his arms around screaming “He loves you, how the fuck do you not see he loves you!”  

Whats even worse, is that its completely obvious to anyone with half a brain and frankly to several people with at least 4 PH D’s, that Tony is just as gone on the two super-boyfriends as they are him. But the idiots are too stubborn to see it or something!  Sam’s just plain sick of it.

Natasha nudges pointedly him with her elbow, “Quit being so obvious. Or they’re gonna see you staring.”

“Obvious! I am not the one being obvious, they’re the ones being obvious!” he exclaims frustration evident.

Natasha just gives him one of her vicious smiles, while leaning in to whisper in his ear, ”Don’t worry Clint, Phil, Rhodey and I have a plan. You want in?”

Does he bloody ever.

-

Sam couldn’t help but grin from ear to ear, because three days later the plans officially in motion. Really its a thing of beauty. The lets-get-these-sappy-idiots-together squad set up traps all over the tower and now they’d get to see the fruits of their labor.

Clint’s up first, this morning.

Tony’s sitting at the island sipping on his daily-dose of caffeine goodness, the super-boyfriends sitting across from him digging into their respective breakfasts. That’s when Clint makes his perfectly timed entrance.  A little help from JARVIS and the plan is a go.

Clint leans over, quick as fox and plants a sloppy kiss on Tony’s unsuspecting lips. Tony splutters in protest, “What the hell Hawkass?”

“Dude, thems the rules.”

“What rules?”

“Whoever is under the mistletoe gets the big ol’ kisses.”  Then Clint leans in again just to mess with Tony and lays another wet one on him. He pulls away with a smile, turns, grabs himself a mug of coffee and then bounds out of the room.

All the while two very stunned and jealous looking super-soldiers glare after the man.

Tony looks up inquiringly only to see a sprig of holographic mistletoe above his head and bursts out laughing.  He looks at Steve and Bucky with devilish grin, who have miraculously schooled their faces, shrugs and saunters off down towards the lab.

Two smoldering gazes trail after him as he leaves.

Sam counts round one as a success.

-

Two hours, a battle and a debrief later, its most certainly Natasha’s turn.

Only this time it’s in the middle of the doorway leading out of the conference room.  
Tony is standing in the door getting ready to flee, when Natasha slams him into the doors frame and seduces his mouth, quite skillfully with hers.

After shes done kissing him within an inch of his life, she walks out with a spring in her step leaving a thoroughly stunned and dopey looking Tony behind. Tony looks up to find yet another sprig of mistletoe (the real stuff this time). He chuckles halfheartedly and mumbles a ‘sweet zeus’ before stumbling out of the room.

Sam can’t help but notice , that there’s four new indents in the conference table that look suspiciously like hand-prints. The outraged looks on both Steve and Bucky’s faces confirms that theory entirely.

Sam shares a smirk with Rhodey across from him.

Round Two. Natasha 1  Steve and Bucky 0.

-

Phil steps up to bat when Tony and he cross paths on the way to the elevator. Phil delivers his kiss with a sweet tenderness, cupping Tony’s face gently. Leaving Tony standing in shock behind him.

The bowl of popcorn Bucky had been holding cracks sharply, under the force of his suddenly clenching fists. The remote doesn’t look like its fairing much better in Steve’s hand.

Sam is really trying hard not to laugh (and failing, but sue him).

Round three, he hopes they crack soon, cause hes not sure the appliances can take much more of this.

-

The next day Rhodey starts them off, when Tony goes out to greet him after a test flight of the upgraded War Machine armor.

Rhodey gives him a big old smile, scoops him still wearing his suit and gives him a sloppy, goofy kiss right on the mouth. Tony just laughs and pretends to try to tear the suit off him passionately. Sam can’t help, but smile at the dorks.

He hears an exasperated, “How the hell did Katniss even get Mistletoe to hang out here for Thor’s sake, Honey-bear?” just as hes walking back into the living room to await his boyfriend. Then he sees Bucky and Steve respectively glaring daggers out the window. The one with the view of the landing pad.

He doesn’t think it’ll take much more now.

Somehow Clint gets the rest of the team and even Maria in on the plot.

Thor and Jane, claim kiss on his cheeks walking through the kitchen.

Happy gives him a smooch on his chin after opening the door for him. 

Maria kisses him chastely, on the way out of a meeting.

Bruce gives him a quick  peck on the tip of his nose, as they walk down to his lab together.

Pepper bestows a kiss to his forehead as he leaves her office.

Each kiss in perfect view of two now, very pissed off super soldiers.

Each kiss resulting in angry jealous faces, narrowed eyes and broken appliances.

Round four, and they are clearly nearing their breaking point.

-

It’s the morning after that they finally, loose their cool.

Sam finally gets his opportunity, after walking into the kitchen to see Tony standing in front of the coffee maker.

He smiles when he sees Clint’s latest conveniently placed mistletoe. Bucky and Steve enter the kitchen from the other side moments later.

Perfect.

Sam swoops in, dips Tony in a cheesy romantic fashion and kisses the hell of his boyfriends best friend. Tony just sort of holds on for the ride, startled and but sort of expecting it at this point. He can feel Tony giggle against his mouth and whoa shit if he hadn’t been dating Rhodey quite happily, he’d snatch these soft lips up in heart beat.

Then it happens. The finally snap. It’s fucking fantastic.

“THAT’S IT!” Bucky yells, clearly fucking done.

Sam straightens them both up, setting Tony on his feet and looks at Bucky seemingly in innocent confusion.

“Man, what is it? Everything alright?”

“NO IT’S NOT FUCKING WELL ALRIGHT! I HAVE HAD TO WATCH OUR ENTIRE FUCKING TEAM, PLUS MARIA AND FUCKING AGENT COULSON KISS THE MAN I AM FUCKING WELL IN LOVE WITH AND I AM SICK OF IT.”

“Wait hold on Bucky its just the mistletoe game everyone-“

“WE KNOW SAM.” That’s Steve this time, which is _ridiculously_ beautiful. “BUT TONY IS OFF FUCKING LIMITS, THIS WHOLE DAMN TOWER NEEDS TO STOP KISSING HIM RIGHT THIS FUCKING INSTANT.”

That’s Sam’s cue.

“Why? He seems to be enjoying the attention and it’s not like hes taken. He can kiss whoever he wants. ”

Steve deflates a little mouth shutting and closing helplessly. Tony is just standing there wide eyed staring at the three of them looking dazed and confused.

But Bucky (thank heavens) has had enough apparently. What comes out of his mouth next is the holy grail of confessions and makes everything absolutely glorious (in Sam’s expert opinion), ” WELL HE SURE AS HELL IS TAKEN NOW, AND IF ANOTHER ONE OF YOU PUNKS TRIES KISSING OUR BOYFRIEND MISTLETOE OR NO I AM GONNA TRACK YOU DOWN AND KICK YOUR ASS.”

Sam gives them a shit eating grin and puts his hands up in mock surrender, “Oh well, that’s great. Glad to know Tony’s your boyfriend. I’ll let the rest of the team know then, sorry for the mix up. Won’t happen again.” With a shit eating grin still in place he says, “See you guys at dinner.” and strides victoriously out of the room leaving a spluttering Tony in his wake.

Bucky’s mouth goes slack in something akin to horror, Steve standing next to him gaping like a fish.

Tony finally manages to speak, “Bo-yfri-end?  You want me to be your boyfriend?” “You _both_? Want _me_?  JARVIS is this a dream?”

Bucky opens his mouth soundlessly, seems to think better of it and surges forward. He wraps Tony up in his arms and kisses the daylights out of him.  

Steve at his back, gently tears his mouth from Bucky’s and replaces it with his own, plundering him sinfully with his tongue and lips.

Steve and Bucky go back and forth devouring his mouth until his a proper puddle of goo trapped between them.

“I’ll take that as a, yes.”  he says gulping in deep breaths when the couple finally let him come up for air.

“Of course we want you Tony, we’ve wanted you for months.”  Steve sounds so wrecked and incredulous, like he expects these things to be obvious.

“What’d ya say punk? Wanna be our Fella?”  Bucky’s drawl is thick and throaty against his collarbone, each word slurred between nipping  kisses.

“Let me and Stevie here, take care of ya?”

Tony doesn’t hesitate, “Fuck yes!”

-

The three of them miss dinner, but Sam doesn’t care hes just fucking happy they finally pulled their collective heads out of their asses. 

Now he can shut James up proper, and orchestrate the double date James has been whining about for months now.  He smiles fondly at his giddy boyfriend, “Should I be worried? You seem happier that Tony is finally getting some, then the fact that I am bout to give you some, right now.”  

Rhodey rolls his eyes, “Shut up, you know I love you. I am just happy for him is all!”  “He was excited when you and I started dating.”  There’s  a little bit of pout in those words and Sam looks fondly over at his very own mad scientist.

“I know babe, its part of the reason I love you two idiots, now shut up and let me blow you. You can tell him all about it tomorrow over breakfast.”

Yeah, he loves his family.

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: I just always imagine Rhodey & Tony being in a epic bromance like Turk & JD okay… Only they are mad scientists and explosion buddies together. Don’t look at me like that. Sam loves his dorks, okay. :P


End file.
